If not, it's OK a non-sheep has been kind enough to put it all in one place for you;
CLICK ME!
If there are too many options to choose from or you are not feeling bold enough to read a large amount of words pertaining to something other than Kim Kardashian here is a video;
DISCLAIMER: The following does not contain dancing animals or poop references;
And of course we must have Kirk Cameron's take on the subject.
So if the History Channel specials are doing their job, you are probably thinking 2012 or something similar. Before you get your bucket list, lets get our old friend SCIENCE in here and see if he can't help us figure this one out.
Whenever sheep talk about ghosts, I always ask the same question "Why does catching a whiff of Chanel no. 5 make you think your grandma has defied physics?" I understand the connection that scent has with death, I've been to nursing homes.
But it seems like a big jump. It's the same with UFO's; some redneck sees a light in the sky and the obvious conclusion in his mind is it's interstellar travelers from another planet. I'm not saying those things don't exist, but how bout letting me in on the secret alchemical magic that is your logistic reasoning?
Sheep can't be burdened with such things as proof, they start with the answer first then try to prove it. Thanks to the internet you are just one google search away from finding a video or article to back up your ignorant point.
That being said, here is an article I found on google that turns our signs of the apocalypse into something even worse, normalcy.
From the article;
"Since the 1970s, the U.S. Geological Survey's National Wildlife Health Center in Wisconsin has tracked mass deaths among birds, fish and other critters, said wildlife disease specialist LeAnn White....In the past eight months, the USGS has logged 95 mass wildlife die-offs in North America and that's probably a dramatic undercount, White said..."
The reality, say biologists, is that these mass die-offs happen all the time and usually are unrelated....Federal records show they happen on average every other day somewhere in North America. Usually, we don't notice them and don't try to link them to each other...."
So lets look at the options here.
A) It's Chemtrails because the government secretly hates us and wants us all dead even though we write their checks
B) The Earth is over the whole "life" thing
C) One curious news story has prompted news reporters to search for stories of similar content exposing the masses to a microcosm of occurrences that happen all the time but regularly go unnoticed because there aren't enough boobs/angry muslims involved.
Which seems the most likely? I'll let you decide.
Don't get me wrong sheep, I'm not saying this isn't important. The fact that mass deaths of animals are the norm is kind of a scary thought.
Besides if you are concerned with the end of the world as we know it you may want to focus your attention on the continuing downward spiral that is our economy. We are approaching the US debt limit; the number set by Congress to limit debt accumulation.
For you sheep, it's like the point which you know if you take another sip of that redbull and vodka you are going to spend the rest of the night either fighting with your girlfriend or hugging a toilet and because of all the taurine in your system the sweet relief of sleep won't come until about 11am.
The current solution is to do what we've done before when we reach this limit, raise it!
Timmy Geithner is basically saying instead of drinking less, we should drink more so we build up a tolerance. Spoken like a true frat boy. We'll see what happens when the country wakes up one morning not remembering the night before and finds the car on the front lawn sitting on cinderblocks, the credit card maxed out, an eviction notice on the front door, and a strange old man sleeping next to you talking about 'trust me, my dad was president'.
Too late.
K
No comments:
Post a Comment